The Law of Attraction for Couples
Have you ever had an instinctive “knowing” that your relationship is more than simply a connection with another person? That there is a purpose in that connection? That it’s a natural channel for attracting what you want in life, whatever that means for you - being cherished, good health, a successful business, healthy finances? Donna and I know this is true and have experienced it, so we want to tell you about it.
I’m sure you’ve all heard of the blockbuster documentary “The Secret” which explained how to make the Law of Attraction work in your life. In a nutshell, the teachers in that film say the process involves:
1) Knowing what you want (being in touch with desire);
2) Asking for it;
3) Being grateful before you get it (”An attitude of gratitude.”);
4) Staying out of the “how” of it (i.e., how it will show up);
5) Being willing to receive it.
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A Personal Story
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But what happens when you boost this natural creative energy that we all have individually by supplementing it with the emotional bond that exists between men and women in relationship? Donna and I believe it creates a sort of a “super-charged” connection with the Universe, like an amplifier boosting the power of an electrical signal. It boosts couples’ natural ability to pull what they want into their lives.
Sound a little hokey? Let’s bring it down to earth. For the last year or so Donna has endured a chronic and annoying health issue. About a month ago Donna was upset and frustrated that the problem wasn’t getting better and that all the medical avenues for dealing with it seemed exhausted. Donna also felt strongly about using an alternative treatment, like homeopathy, rather than pharmaceuticals.
How does this fit into the Law of Attraction steps listed above? First, Donna’s desire was clear - to get rid of the problem naturally as soon as possible. Next, Donna’s frustration was her “request” for me to help. In that moment I resolved that we would find a solution. For me that meant creating additional revenue to easily cover the cost of whatever form of treatment Donna wanted. I didn’t know how this would happen, but I was committed to it.
The combination of Donna’s clear desire and my focused commitment and willingness to act was powerful. That same day, Donna found online a simple natural remedy that has had promising results. Over the next few days two businesses contacted us for possible partnerships. Those contacts sparked a vision for a new venture we will be launching later this year. I also got clear on a new product we will be offering in coming months. A few weeks later we had our largest “Divine Dance of the Sexes” workshop to date. I wasn’t specifically working towards any of these, but I was focused and committed to a result…any result…that was in alignment with Donna’s desire. P-O-W-E-R-F-U-L stuff!
The moment my energy aligned with Donna’s the Universe responded.
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Science Says the Gender Effect is Real and Measurable
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Research from the Princeton Engineering Anomalies Research Lab (PEAR Lab) at Princeton University shows what Donna and I experienced is more than just wishful thinking or coincidence. In numerous experiments between 1979 and 2007 PEAR researchers Robert Jahn and Brenda Dunne discovered that when “bonded” couples (i.e., couples in relationship) tried to influence the output of an electronic random number generator using only their thoughts, their joint effort yielded average effects more than twice those of “unbonded” pairs and nearly six times greater than when men and women intended separately. In other words, the ability to affect change in physical reality using only intention is far stronger for bonded couples than it is for individuals.
According to one analyst, “Jahn and Dunne suggested that emotional closeness might create resonance between individuals, and result in stronger influence, just as two waves that are in phase or sync amplify a signal.”
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Emotional Closeness + Resonance = Creative Power
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If that quote seems like a bunch of scientific mumbo jumbo, you missed it. Failing to get the point of this quote is why relationships so often occur to people as unsatisfying, shallow, without purpose and frustrating… and why so many relationships fail. Read it again, and look for the deeper cut.
Did you see it this time? Emotional closeness creates resonance which results in stronger influence.
Here’s what you need to get. Emotional closeness is just the first step. Resonance, or vibrational harmony with your partner follows. The result is an amplified connection to the Universe that gives you stronger influence for creating what you want for your life.
For most people, creating emotional closeness is all there is in relationship. It’s not just the first step, but the only step. It’s what they think “relationship” is for. It’s great in the beginning when new love makes life sparkle and crackle. This energy is powerful. A friend of ours told us about a colleague who took their company by storm, becoming the number one sales rep almost immediately after being hired. He was also newly married. Coincidence?
Within a year or so this sales rep’s numbers fell off dramatically. Later it was discovered that this decline in production coincided with a very rough time in his relationship that threatened the marriage. That’s what can happen when the light of love dims and there is nothing new to keep it burning. Other areas of life suffer too. That’s exactly why Donna and I do what we do. The Divine Dance is about helping couples stay in sync so they can re-ignite that emotional spark almost at will and maintain the resonance that allows to create whatever you want in life.
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The Law of Attraction Between Men and Women
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But how does this work? Why did couples that participated in the PEAR experiments produce a stronger influence than men and women who are not in relationship or than men and women separately?
The “emotional resonance” of couples mentioned above is key. Feelings are powerful.
Donna and I believe more is going on. In a nutshell, here it is. Men and women are different. Women are desire. Their desire drives the show. Men are about production. They want to produce results in the world. When men and women act according to who they are naturally - i.e., women are clear on their desire and men are committed to focused action - they are in alignment with the Universe’s intent. That alignment is powerful.
With this in mind we could modify the above process for how the Law of Attraction works to explain how it works between men and women like this:
1) Women become clear about what they want (their desire);
2) They ask their partner for it in some way;
3) They are grateful before they get it (for example, by showing they believe in their partner’s ability to produce the result);
4) They don’t worry about “how” it will show up. They don’t let the “how” interfere with their experience of receiving their desire;
5) Men commit to focused action to produce the result (commitment and action indicate a “willingness to receive”); but they do not get tied to a specific way in which that result has to show up.
Implicit in this post is that using the Law of Attraction for relationships isn’t just about attracting a great relationship. It’s deeper and broader than that. It’s about working with your partner to create the life you want. It’s about an energy that exists between You, your Partner and the Universe and how to maximize it. It’s our purpose to show people through our workshops how to create relationships that maximize this natural power in their lives.
A lot of you reading this post will instinctively know the Law of Attraction between men and women is real. You’re invited to experience the satisfaction of getting what you want in life by being in sync with your partner. You can start by downloading our FREE ebook, “A Couple’s Map to Everyday Happiness” at: www.gendercoaches.com/blog/everyday_happiness/
Then, register for the next “Divine Dance of the Sexes” Couples Weekend Workshop by clicking here:
www.gendercoaches.com/programs/
If you have ever experienced the Law of Attraction working in your life through your relationship please take a moment and leave a comment. Thank you and take care.
Now Go Appreciate a Man and Cherish a Woman. That’s All It Takes.
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Comments
Jason and Donna,
Hi, I want to tell you that, after reading your blog, I plan to call upon your services as soon as I find myself a partner again!! You make it sound so very wonderful to be in relationship. I am somewhat jaded… yet still with hope! I know your Mom, Jason. I am looking forward to seeing her play…soon…perhaps Banff or Canmore. Bravo! on doing such important work. I really do believe in the power of ‘2′, especially when it is ‘right’. We probably met at your parents’ 25th…hope to meet you again.
Cheers, Colleen Callahan, Red Deer
Thanks for the comment Colleen. Being in relationship is wonderful but it gets so mired in misunderstandings and stereotypes about the opposite sex - stereotypes we take to be true - that a lot of people are acting in relationship from misinformation. The Divine Dance clears a lot of that up. Even if you’re single, the workshop will set you up for knowing what you want in a partner, and will actually pull that partner towards you. We’ve seen it over and over again. It’s very cool! You can even start today by making a list of the qualities of your ideal partner, believing in it and putting the list somewhere safe and letting the Universe works its magic (If anyone reading this has done ever done this we would love to hear about it. Leave a comment below.)
I feel very fortunate to have the Divine in my life. We all know those couples who seem to have it all figured out. They have the relationship everyone wishes they had themselves. We call them lucky. My Mom and Dad are those people for me. All my life they clearly had something special. Now I know what it is, and it isn’t “luck”. They have been living the Divine Dance for more than 30 years, though they didn’t know it. My Mom always said she’s the “luckiest girl in the world” because Dad treats her like a princess and has always given Mom everything she wants - desire satisfied. Dad is the consumate producer. Mom truly appreciates it and lets Dad know. Dad has contributed to so much of Mom’s happiness. That is every man’s goal in his relationship.
It seems like the perfect circle. After having observed Mom and Dad’s relationship for most of my life, I not only get to live it in my relationship with Donna, but I get to show others how to have it themselves through the Divine Dance.
Thanks again Colleen.
This is so true!!
I took the `Divine Dance of the Sexes` workshop back in October 2009. It has been proved everyday of my life since that when the energy between a man and a woman (which is desire from women and production from men) is exchanged, life keeps going in a positive way. It gives you more energy, just like gas in a car engine.
Once you realize and feel this mechanism, it works amazingly and beautifully.
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